Vanished
by PCGirl
Summary: Follows How to Save a Life. She's been missing for two months and John's not ready to give up yet. But is there someone in Llanview that really does know where Natalie is and has plans of his own for her?
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Ok, so I was mean with the ending of How to Save a Life. Here's the sequel--set two months after. Ya'll enjoy--I'll have more for you later this week, I promise. Until next time--ya'll are the best--PCGirl.

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Disclaimer: All characters are property of ABC/Disney--I'm just borrowing them. :)

John closed the file and shoved it over to the side of his desk—he take it to the secretary to file on his way out of the office. The past week he'd thrown himself into all the cases he'd been neglecting for the past two months—and now he was done with all of them. "All but one," he said out loud and he opened the bottom drawer to his desk and pulled a manila file out from the back and placed it in front of him.

He'd put it back there last week—hoping out of sight, out of mind would work, but it didn't—not really. It couldn't work when he thought every red head on the street he saw walk around a corner was her. It'd been two damn months and it was like she'd dropped off the face of the planet. He'd gone everywhere he could possibly think she could be—cashing in favors with old buddies from the FBI—even Asa had put searches out for her—but they still came up with nothing.

He slid the letter she'd written him to the side—reading the words still hurt, even when his gut feeling had told him she'd been forced to write it. There had been two other letters sent by her that day—one to Jessica and one to Rex. Jessica's spoke of what Natalie had talked about time and time before, her guilt over how she'd acted when she first came to town. Asking her twin to forgive her for everything that happened—and that when she got her head and life straightened out she would contact Jess.

Jess still hadn't received that call.

Rex's had talked about places they used to go when growing up in AC. About how she always loved him and missed him—how she couldn't walk past those places after he was gone and not think of him.

John had used Rex's letter as a treasure map—hoping she would leave someone a sign at those locations as to who had her and where she was. Nothing had turned up—but he had people keeping an eye on the locations just in case.

"Where are you, Natalie?" he sighed as he closed the file and slipped it back in the back of his drawer before grabbing his coat and calling it a night—it was already after 10, but he figured he still had time for a beer to numb the loneliness.

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"I need another, Mac," said John as he finished off his beer and put the empty bottle on the table.

"No, John—I think you've had enough for one night. Why don't I call you a cab?"

"No—no cab for me, I can walk," he said as he stumbled off of the stool and turned completely around before looking at Mac. "Did I ever ask you Mac? If you saw her that day."

"No, I didn't—wish I had though. Sit back down—I'll call Michael to come get you," he sighed as John agreed and was able to get himself back on the stool.

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"Ok, we're home," said Michael as he opened the door to the cottage and helped his brother in the door.

"It's not home—not really," he mumbled as he made it to the stairs.

"I know—maybe we should move out of here—Marcie and I were thinking of buying a place of our own—maybe moving out of here will be a good idea for you too."

"I'm not leaving here—not until she's back in Llanview and has our mother's ring on her finger again," he said as he went up the stairs, though he knew sleep wouldn't come—it hadn't in two months.

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"John!" she screamed as she sat up in bed—the scenes in her dreams had been scattered as always. These past few months—trying to remember her life from before had been unbearable because those scenes made no sense—they were something out of one of those crazy dramas on television.

She heard the door knob turn and saw him open the door to come check on her, "It's nothing, Dad—just another bad dream—just go to sleep."

"You want me to give you something to help you sleep?" he asked, pushing her hair out of her face.

"No—I just wish I could remember—," she stopped, her blue eyes filling with tears as they had been for months. It was the dark that brought the nightmares and the visions—he said it was because that's when the fire had happened that had taken her husband, but that with time she'd forget him.

"Trust me—it's better to not remember, with time it will become easier and you will forget all about that life. Now get some sleep, sweetheart—I've got something special planned for you tomorrow," smiled Mitch Lawrence as he walked out of her bedroom and closed the door behind him.


	2. Chapter 2

John splashed his face with cold water before opening the medicine cabinet and taking two Tylenol out for the splitting headache he had—he should have known better than to go to Rodi's last night—it never ended well the next morning.

He grabbed a shirt that was hanging over the side of a chair in the bedroom and gave it a good whiff to see if it was still wearable, but his eyes glanced into the closet and a plastic bag sitting on the shelf and he reached for it and carried it to the bed—his mind remembering why he'd bought it in the first place.

"_Hey John—where are you and Natalie at?" asked Michael on the phone, his tone reminded John of a small child with a big secret._

"_I'm at work—I'm kinda busy, Mike," said John—distracted as he wanted to join Rex and Antonio who were now searching Llanview for Natalie—he knew she hadn't wrote those letters—they'd finally gotten it right—she wouldn't abandon him like that._

"_Well, hey—when you two get home—."_

"_Home? Home sorta burned up in flames last night, Mike."_

"_She didn't tell you yet?" laughed Michael. "She's got the four of us and Tommy living under the same roof at the Cottage. Anyways—when you two get home I've got some big news to share with you."_

"_I—I don't know when she'll be home—or myself for that matter."_

"_What? Is everything ok?"_

"_She's gone Michael—I think someone took her—I don't even know where they grabbed her at. What time did she leave the hospital? Was everything ok with her labs before she left?"_

"_Yeah—except one thing that I didn't realize until after she'd left."_

"_What?"_

"_It's nothing—I'm sure she'll be careful and we don't need to worry."_

"_Just tell me, Mike," he said, getting even more frustrated with his brother's beating around the bush on the issue._

"_She's pregnant John—just a couple weeks, but she's definitely pregnant."_

John pulled the blanket out of the bag—it was white with a pink satin border around the edge. He'd been walking down the street in a haze one day and saw it in a store window. He didn't know why, but he immediately knew he wanted it for their baby girl—the one that would start his and Natalie's life together.

As he ran his fingers over the soft material he knew one thing—he'd find Natalie before their baby had a chance to use the blanket. There wasn't any other option.

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He took a look around, his hands in stuffed in his pockets as he waited for someone to answer the door. As he put his head down he remembered the last time he was here—how Mitch had helped him bring Natalie into the house and then instructed him to leave and not return until he was summoned.

"_What are you doing here?" asked Natalie as she stood in the burned hotel room._

"_I heard you were almost killed—just checking up on a friend," he spoke, flashing his smile._

_Something didn't feel right and Natalie was ready to leave and get to the station where she was sure John was wrapping up for the day—even though she'd slept most of the night she was exhausted and just wanted to be back in his arms. "Well, I'm fine—John got me out before I was really hurt. I'll see you around," she said as she walked past him, not making eye contact._

"_Hey—let me drive you to the station at least," he said as he caught up with her down the hall._

"_I can walk—it's not far," she said as she felt him put his hand on her arm and she tried to shake him off. He saw her jump slightly as he pushed the needle into her arm through her shirt and then fell into his arms as she lost consciousness._

As the door opened he looked at Mitch's face and once again wondered if he had done the right thing months ago, "I got your message."

"Come in. We've got business to discuss," he said as he let him in and closed and locked the door behind them both.

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John walked down the cold gray hallway like he had once a week for the past two months. As he reached his cell he noticed the man was staring at the ceiling on the top bunk, "You ready to talk?"

"About what exactly? Politics? The economy? My picks for the Superbowl next year?"

"Keep it up, Lawrence—you know what I want," said John, his hands on his hips as he stared at Miles through the bars—the man knew who had attacked him the night of the fire and since then he'd clammed up.

"Yeah, I do," he said as he jumped off the bunk. "She's about this tall, red hair, the most gorgeous blue eyes—not to mention the body of a goddess," he said with an evil grin—keeping a safe distance between himself and the bars to the cell—he'd learned his lesson in the beginning to not get within John's reach—especially when it came to him finding Natalie.

"Who left you so badly beaten that you didn't regain consciousness for two days, Miles?"

"Like I told you last week—and the week before—and the week before that—I don't remember. My memories about that night are so fuzzy—it could have been anyone—hell, it could have been you."

"If it had been me you would have never woken up."

"You don't care about my attack—you just think it'll help you find Natalie. Man—you don't know her like I did back then, but I think she split on purpose."

"She wouldn't do that."

"Maybe she would—maybe she realized how stupid the idea of every finding anyone in Llanview was and she just wanted to start over—new life, new lover—a new man getting to moan her name night after night," he grinned as he walked backwards and leaned against his bed.

"I think you're just jealous of what we had—have," he said correcting himself quickly.

"Sounds like someone isn't too sure that she's the one after all. Two months and you've come up with nothing, McBain—if I were you I'd give up the search—she's not worth it."

"Trust me, she's worth it," said John as he turned and left. He hadn't expected anything more out of the conversation—this one had ended just like the others with Miles insinuating Natalie had left on her own, but he'd be back next week to see if Miles finally wanted to talk. Eventually someone was going to want to talk about what they saw in that alleyway that night and at the hotel the next afternoon with Natalie disappeared.

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"I want to see Natalie," he said bluntly as they made their way into some a room with some scattered chairs and tables that held ornate vases on them.

"In due time—let's talk about your share of the deal—control of a few of your businesses."

"Not until I know she's ok. I left her here two months ago and haven't heard a word from you. Do you know how difficult it was to continue living in Llanview like it was nothing? Now I suggest you let me see her or else I'll have to walk out that door and straight to John McBain and tell him what I know."

"You do that and the next time you see her will be in a casket," he threatened.

"Dad?" said a quiet voice from the doorway.

He turned and looked at her—physically she was fine, but looking into her eyes he didn't see the fire that they held that had drawn him to her immediately. Instead she seemed meek and timid—and he wondered exactly what Mitch had done to her in order to make her that way.

"Darling—I was just doing a little business with my friend here—is everything ok?"

"It's fine," she said as she walked out two both of them. He took note of her hair now that she was in the light—the color was the same, but just like her eyes—it didn't have the same sparkle and shine as it normally had—that was when he realized this wasn't the Natalie he'd fallen in love with.

"You must be Natalie," he smiled as he took her hand and brought it up to his lips. He'd half expected her to pull away and slap him, but was surprised when she didn't flinch at all.

"And you are?" she asked, feeling like she almost knew him from somewhere.

"I'm sorry—my name is Vincent Jones and let me tell you it is a definite pleasure meeting you today."


	3. Chapter 3

Natalie opened her eyes slowing—trying to hold onto the dream she'd been having—they'd been coming steadier lately and normally she woke up with a smile on her face.

This one was clearer than the others, she'd been lying on a rooftop staring at the stars, a smile on her face and in the dream she'd seen a shooting star and then she'd looked next to the person lying beside her. This had been the first time she'd actually been able to make out his face and she'd known instantly it was John.

She sighed as her hand went over her stomach—she was showing more now, but she couldn't help but hope her memories would come back so she could tell their child about a father it would never know.

There were a few things she knew about him from the memories she was getting—he was a cop and she felt like she'd worked at the police station too—she wondered if that's how they had met, but it didn't feel like that was what connected them.

There was also something that had to do with a pool table—she'd remembered playing and dancing next to one a couple nights ago, and wondered she was any good.

Natalie wished she could ask her father about what she was like before, but every time she brought up her past life he told her it was better for her to forget—better for her not to remember the struggles she went through before, but something pulled at her to want to remember—because she didn't want her past to disappear, she wanted to embrace it and move on with whatever it carried.

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John had been slowing waking from the dream—they'd been here on the rooftop watching the stars, talking about wishes, dreams, and happiness. He'd felt the first rays of sun hit the rooftop, but hadn't moved—he wanted to keep dreaming—keep holding onto her.

It was the sound of the door slowly opening that had him waking and jumping to his feet quickly—he almost expected to see her standing there in the doorway, escaped from her captors and knowing exactly where he would be, "Evangeline," he said in disappointment as he wiped his hands over his face.

"I—I saw your car downstairs—did you sleep here last night?" asked Evangeline as she looked around at the Angel Square Hotel rooftop.

John ignored her question—instead opting to grab the blanket he'd laid on last night and folded it up. "Is that a crime counselor? I did live here before—might again once the renovations are finished," he said as he finally turned to look at her and hated the sympathy that so easily showed in her eyes.

"No, no it's not, but this isn't healthy John. I think you should look at the possibility that Natalie left on her own accord and didn't care what her family would go through."

"No," he yelled as he looked at her. "She wouldn't do that—not when—," he stopped at mentioning the baby. Not everyone knew she was pregnant—only his and her immediate family and they all had agreed it was best to keep quiet about it until she was home.

"I think she would. That's how she is—when she wants attention she goes off and does something stupid. All she's wanting is attention," said Evangeline as she came close to him and put her hand on his arm.

John laughed at the thought and removed her hand quickly from his arm, "This isn't some little game where you and I are together Evangeline and she puts herself in harms way. This is where she and I were engaged, are starting our family, and someone has kidnapped her and forced her to write goodbye letters to her loved ones. Natalie never once gave up on me—and you should know I'm not one to walk out on my responsibilities either," he said as he grabbed his leather jacket he'd used as a pillow and began walking towards the door.

"I didn't mean it like that John—I was just trying to be a friend is all."

"You want to be a friend? Fine—as a part of the DA's office get ready to throw the book at whoever is keeping my family from me because we're going to find them soon," he said as he looked at her before slamming the door shut behind him.

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Vincent finished up his work with Mitch and went looking for Natalie. He'd signed over some minor assets to the man today and soon he'd be able to get Natalie away from him.

He hated what the man had done to her—turned her from the firey redheaded woman that he'd admired months ago and into a meek childlike person now.

He hated himself for putting her in this situation, but he'd get over it—they would leave this area of the country all together and then he could give Natalie everything she deserved—not hurt her like McBain had done time and time again.

He found her walking outside around the gardens, "Hey," he said coming up to her and noticed her profile—she was pregnant and he knew instantly it was McBain's. _Damn it,_ he thought, this changed everything—didn't it?

"Hey," she smiled and sat down on the stone bench next to where she'd been standing.

"Beautiful day, isn't it?" he said as he sat down next to her, not making eye contact though—not seeing the passion in her blue eyes killed him and he knew he should take her away from here now—not play by Mitch's rules anymore.

"Yeah," she said absently and started talking about her thoughts. "Do you play pool?"

"What?" said Vincent, taken back by the comment she'd made and wondered how much she was already starting to remember.

"Pool—do you play? I think I did before—in my other life," she said and laughed at the absurdity of the phrase _other life_—it was a part of this life, just one she didn't remember at the moment. "I think about it and the thought of the rush from winning—it's amazing, you know," she said. "I want to play pool—I want to go to a casino and play slots—I want to go outside of these four walls and gardens and find myself again, Vincent," she said as she stood up and spun around, their eyes making contact and he saw the fire and passion he knew so well in them.

"Well, maybe I can help you with that," he said standing up in front of her, "I've got an art gallery event to attend in the city this evening. Why don't you get all dolled up and you can be my escort?" he grinned.

"I'm sure you can find someone else to go with—why me?" she asked, not understanding why a strange would want to take her out on a date—they knew nothing of each other, right? It was confusing—she almost thought he was in a memory from the other night—one that had her standing over a grave, but then she thought she was confusing what she knew about her past with the present and shook it off.

"Why not? You just said you wanted to get out of here—no strings, I promise—just a couple hours away from this place. Who knows—maybe you'll find the old you."

"Ok—I'll go. It'll be fun—right?" she said, and she knew that along with pool, art also had a part to do with her past.

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John walked into his office and threw his coat over the arm of a chair—he 'd spent most of the day out of the office—trying to focus on other cases that needed his attention. That's what he'd always done best—tried to push Natalie out of his thoughts—was Evangeline right? Did Natalie really just give up and leave? Was she planning on raising their child alone and not let him have a part in her life?

No—he couldn't believe that—wouldn't believe that because they had gotten it right—it wasn't fairytale perfect, but then they never were.

He sat down at his desk and looked at the manila envelope sitting in his in box—he hadn't remembered requesting anything be sent to his office—had he? Being cautious he pulled open his side desk drawer and pulled out a pair of gloves before handing the envelope. He opened it and let the contents fall onto his desk—there was a folded piece of paper and as he unfolded it he saw her and it literally felt like a giant rock dropping into his stomach—it was an ultrasound image of his child with the words written below it in an unfamiliar handwriting, _You can look but you'll never be able to touch._

He dropped the paper on his desk and took a deep breath while staring at the picture, his finger tracing the profile of her face—he took his gaze off of it and blinked back the tears before calmly reaching for the phone and calling Bo's office, "I've got something on Natalie."


	4. Chapter 4

Cristian walked into the gallery quietly—there was a showing tonight, but the owner of the gallery had talked to him over the phone and asked him to come up there tonight. He had sent a small portfolio of his more recent art to him a month ago and the man now wanted to talk to him about doing a showing of his work in the near future.

He didn't see the owner just yet so he began making his way around the first room in the gallery slowly, taking not of the artists technique and wondering if he'd ever be able to paint like he used to.

It was the flash of red through the doorway to the next room that caught his eye and at first he thought he was imagining things—that it was just like every other time he'd seen a redhead in the past few months, but once again he had to make sure it wasn't Natalie.

As he reached the doorway he saw her and he froze—Natalie was standing there staring at a painting. It took him a few seconds to register that standing next to her was Vincent Jones.

Had they all been wrong these past months? Had she left on her own and not cared about what her family would be going through without her there? He started to confront her and then she glanced his way—looked straight at him, but it was like she was staring at a stranger as she turned herself and Vincent away from him and kept on walking.

He looked beyond her and saw there was a patio outside and made his way to the patio door on the part of the gallery he was in.

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"You know—maybe we're looking at this all wrong," said Bo as he leaned back in his chair while John continued moving through hours of surveillance footage from the day. They'd already run the paper the ultrasound photo was on and the envelope through forensics—and as expected they came back clean for prints.

"Someone dropped that envelope on my desk Bo," he said as he paused on the video of the hallway one of his office doors was at.

"I know. So let's work backwards—we know for sure now that Natalie has been kidnapped," he said as he saw the look John gave him. "I never doubted she was John—but we have the evidence now. And at least—at least we know she's getting care for the pregnancy. Who would want Natalie? Let's start with a list—that might help with the suspects, if any, that show up on this video."

"Number one on my list—Vincent Jones," said John as he turned away from the television and the two men started discussing the details once again—hoping this time something would click.

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Cris watched Natalie through the patio doors for a few minutes—he hadn't been surprised by the baby bump that was quickly growing, Antonio had told him in secret one night that Natalie had been pregnant, but he'd followed his brother's request and told no one.

Vincent started to speak to someone and she began to walk his way onto the patio. He moved to the railing, his back to the door, and took a big breath as he heard it open and her heels click on the tile as she came next to him.

"Beautiful night," she said, wrapping her arms around herself as she glanced at Cristian.

"Yeah," he said as he looked at her and made eye contact—part of him wanted to hug her, he'd started to think the worst had happened to her, and part of him wanted to yell at her—ask her what the hell she was thinking, hanging with Vincent while her family worried about her. But when he looked at her up close he realized something was seriously wrong, "What happened Natalie?"

"How—how did you know my name?" she asked as she looked around and saw they were alone on the patio. "Do you know me? Did we know each other from before?"

"Before—?"

"The fire—it wiped out my memories. All I know is what my father has told me—my husband died in the fire and that it's better to not remember the life from before."

"Your father?" he asked, confused and he knew she wasn't speaking of Clint. "What is his name?"

"Mitch Lawrence. Who are you?"

He felt his blood begin to boil at knowing it was Mitch that was behind her disappearance, "I'm Cristian—you know me—now come with me," he said as he took her hand.

"No—I don't know you—where are you taking me?" she yelled and he let her out of his grasp in fear that she would make a scene and Vincent would come to investigate.

"To John—and everyone else in Llanview."

"John's dead—and I've never heard of Llanview."

"I don't know what Mitch told you or what he did to you, but John is alive, Natalie, and Mitch is not your father," he said as he watched her eyes widen with fear. "Now will you please come with me?"

"No, if what you are saying is true we need to catch him in the act. My going with you won't help them—won't help John—and he needs closure, the one thing that's always haunted him is a lack of closure," she said and then covered her mouth at the words, but she knew they were true at the same time.

Cris smiled at her saying the words—she was remembering things, and suddenly he wasn't sure if leaving her in this limbo state of reality was a good idea. He looked towards the tinted patio doors and saw Vincent was coming their way and quickly took his cell phone out of his pocket, "Take this—do not let anyone see it—not even Vincent. I'll call you when I get to the Police Station."

"I'll see you soon Cris—give Jessica a hug for me when you see her," she said, shocked at both saying the name and instantly knowing who it was.

As he looked back he worried that this was the wrong thing to do—he should just grab her and go—but then she didn't fully trust him yet and he thought she might make a scene, and he was sure if that happened no one would ever see Natalie again.

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Bo and John both turned as the door to Bo's office burst open and Cristian walked through, "We're in the middle of something Cris—this is going to have to wait."

"It can't—I saw Natalie. Vincent Jones has her."

"What? Where is she? Why didn't you bring her with you?" asked John as he jumped out of his seat.

"I couldn't—it would have been too dangerous."

"Too dangerous? You left her with him?" accused John as he walked closer to Cristian.

Bo got out of his chair, ready to jump between the two men, "Wait, John—let Cris tell us what happened."

"At first she remembered nothing, when I left her though—she was remembering more. She thinks Mitch Lawrence is her father and that you two were married, but you are dead," he said, referring to John.

"Ok—where is she? How do we find her?"

"She's got my cell phone—I told her I'd call her," he said as they both saw Antonio and Jessica join the room.

"Jess—why don't you wait outside?" asked Antonio as he put his hands on her shoulders.

"No—she's my sister—I want to talk to her. Did I hear you right, Cris? Does Mitch Lawrence have her?"

"It'll be ok, Jess—we're going to get her back," said Bo as he passed his phone over to Cristian to dial the number and motioned to Antonio to close the door to the office.

Cristian set the phone back down after he dialed and placed it on speaker phone as they listened to it ring, "Cristian?" came an uneasy voice and John grabbed the back of the chair hard at hearing her voice. In his dreams he'd heard her voice every night, but for it to finally hear it while he was awake—was almost more than he could handle.

"Yeah—it's me. Are you alone? Is it safe to talk?"

"Yeah—I think I'm safe. Who is with you?"

"I'm here Nat," said Jessica as she walked forward.

"Jess?" said Natalie, her eyes starting to fill with tears at hearing yet another calming voice she recognized.

"Yeah, it's me," spoke Jessica, wiping tears from her eyes. "You're going to be home soon—Antonio, John, and Uncle Bo are all going to make sure of that."

"John—are you there?" she asked, hope rising and suddenly she had a smile on her face.

"Yeah—I'm here," he said, his head down as he tried to stay calm and in cop mode—just for a bit longer, he thought. "Listen," he said looking back up at Bo and then over to Antonio. "This is what I need you to do Natalie. Leave the phone on—do not hang up—but put it somewhere, out of sight—in a drawer, under the pillow. Something so we can keep tracking the signal—we'll be there soon."

"Hurry John—I—I don't know what he has planned next."

"We are—I'm not giving up until you and our baby are home safe with me and your family," he said, his emotions breaking through, the tone in his voice had immediately softened at the word baby.

"You know I'm pregnant?" she asked in a shocked voice.

"Yeah—and I couldn't be happier," he said as he noticed everyone else was silent and he suddenly felt uncomfortable. "We'll be there soon—I promise," he said as the three cops headed out the office door—Bo shouting for backup officers to come with them—leaving Cristian and Jessica to sit and wait for word.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: This chapter is dedicated to my new favorite author--Pehlam Absalom--and her awesome story Belum (one chapter a week is not enough!). You have a gift, my dear, don't waste it. And you also bring up a great question...Sam vs. Frosty. Though I always loved the elf (what was his name? Herbie? heheheh). I need a Curran in my story--what do ya'll think? hehehe. Ok, enough rambling--ya'll enjoy! Until next time--ya'll are the best--PCGirl.

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"Do you think we should stay here? They'll probably take Natalie to the hospital to be checked out first, right?" asked Jessica out loud as her and Cristian sat in the station.

"We can go to the hospital if you want, but let's here from Bo first," he said, not wanting to leave Jessica—not until he was sure Natalie was safe.

"Officer Sayid—is the Commish here?" questioned Vincent Jones as he walked into the squad room All he saw was a blur out of the corner of his eye before being shoved to the ground by Cristian and then repeatedly hit in the face until another officer was able to pull him off. "What the hell was that for?"

"For Natalie—for letting that sicko Lawrence to get near her again," he said as he finally looked at the officer and let him know he wouldn't attack a second time.

"What are you talking about?"

"I saw you two tonight—how she's got all her facts messed up on who she is truly married to and who her father is."

"Why didn't you tell me you were there? We could have gotten her out of there safely, man—I couldn't do it by myself though."

"Why? Is Shawn not a part of this little scheme this time?" he asked as he started to go towards Vincent again.

Talia jumped between the two men, "Jones—why did you come here tonight?"

"I wanted to tell Commissioner Buchannan everything I know about Natalie's disappearance. Mitch Lawrence is a nut job and I don't like the idea of her being around him anymore."

"Nice to see you've had a change of heart," spat Cristian.

"Ok, that's enough, Cristian," said Talia as she looked at him and back to Vincent. "Bo, John, and Antonio are all on their way to where Natalie is being held—but they will want to talk to you when they get back," she said as she motioned for him to walk to an interrogation room to wait.

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Bo stood there in the doorway watching John—he was flipping through photos quietly, oblivious to the Crime Scene team working around him. With each new picture he watched John run his finger over it and then wait a moment before going to the next one.

When they had gotten to the house earlier it had been dark and quiet—both he and John knew at that instant they'd missed Lawrence and Natalie already, but still went slowly through the house until finding Natalie's room empty.

At finding her room empty he and Antonio had gone to search the rest of the house and left John alone with his thoughts.

"What do you have there?" asked Bo as he walked up to John and a smile appeared on his face at seeing the ultrasound photos.

"She's beautiful—isn't she?" asked John as he stared at them some more. "I know it's crazy, but I think she has Natalie's nose—that's a good thing, right?" he asked, a sideways smile appearing on his face as he tried to make a lame joke—anything to break the tension in the air.

He rubbed his eyes to hide the tears that wanted to come out before grabbing a plastic evidence bag and dropping the photos in it before handing it off to one of the techs in the room. He wouldn't let his emotions get to him right now—not in front of other people and especially when Natalie was still out there in danger.

"We need to get Jones into the station for questioning—he either knows where Natalie is or Lawrence pulled the wool over his eyes—and Jones doesn't seem to be the type that is easily double crossed," he said—his voice cool as he forced himself into cop mode.

"I just called the station—apparently he's already there—Cris threw a punch at him when he walked in. Wanted to fess up to knowing where Natalie has been this whole time."

"How noble of him," snarked John as the two men went to find Antonio and head back to Llanview.

-----------------

John walked in with his head down and looked up to see Officer Sayid standing in the squad room with Cris and Jessica behind her, "Where's Jones?" He kept his eyes on Talia—he couldn't look at Jessica or the realization of failing Natalie would hit him once again.

"He's in interrogation room five," she answered and watched him turn and pass Bo in the hallway. The two men exchanged a few words and Bo gave a brief nod before walking into the squad room.

At seeing her uncle Jessica immediately began a barrage of questions, "Where's Natalie? Is she ok? Can I see her?"

Bo gave a deep sigh, "I'm sorry—by the time we got there both her and Mitch were gone. We've got a team sweeping the house now. Hopefully they will come up with some type of lead."

"And if they don't?" spoke Cristian.

"Then maybe Vincent Jones can shed some light on the situation," he said as he looked at Jessica who was just standing there quietly thinking. "You ok, Jess?"

She shook her head quickly, not looking directly at Bo, "No—my sister is missing and I feel like there's nothing I can do to help. Mom's already stressing over her disappearance, if I tell her Mitch Lawrence has her—." Jessica stopped her rant and realized the one person who knew more than he ever let on. "That's it," she said as she turned and grabbed her purse.

"Jess," begged Cristian—scared as to what she was thinking of doing.

"I'll be careful—but I have to at least try and talk to him," she said. "If you want to come with me then hurry—who knows how much time we have," she said as she started hurrying out of the station with Cristian right behind her.

-----------------

John leaned against the wall beside the interrogation room—his eyes were closed and he was just trying to focus on the next step in the investigation.

All he could think about when he closed his eyes was walking into that empty bedroom—he'd picked up the pillow off the bed and immediately recognized her scent, then looked down and saw she'd put the ultrasound photos under the pillow for him to find.

He heard footsteps and glanced to see Bo was walking towards him, "How did Jessica take it?"

"She ran off—said she knew who would tell her where Natalie was. Don't worry, Cris went with her," he said after the look John gave him.

"Sounds like something Natalie would do," he said softly as he started for the door handle.

Bo grabbed his arm and stopped him in his tracks, "John—go home—it's been a long day, I'll talk with Vincent."

"No, I'm fine. I'll stop when I find Natalie and our daughter," he stated as he took a deep breath before going into the room. "Hello, Jones."

Vincent laughed at seeing John walk in, "Figures you'd want to interrogate me. What'd you do—drop Natalie off at the hospital and tell her you'd be there later for her? See—that is why I did what I did in the first place—because you're an ass and don't know how to treat her right."

"I can't do that—because when we got to the house both Natalie and Mitch were gone," said John as he watched Vincent's face. "Did you know that? Did you know they would be gone when we got there? Where was he taking her next Jones? Is there some sort of drop off point where you and him make a transaction for her, or has that already happened and your coming here just a red herring?" questioned John, his voice getting louder with each accusation.

"What? No—I dropped her off at the doorstep—everything was fine. Why would Mitch have taken her somewhere else? That wasn't the plan," he mumbled the last part to himself.

"What was the plan then?"

"You know what—I came here on my own for Natalie's safety. I'm not getting snowballed into being the villain by you two because you couldn't find her first—I want my lawyer before I say anything else."

---------------

Jessica walked straight into the small, cinder-blocked room, with her head held high and her mind focused on one thing—Natalie. When she saw a smug grin appear on his face she said nothing, but sat down across from the table instead, "Did you ever really have an interest in having a relationship with me or was it all a sham?"

Miles grinned and leaned in, "If it isn't my favorite niece—how has life been going for you?"

"It would be a lot better if your brother wasn't holding Natalie hostage—now answer my question."

He shrugged as if was nothing, "Yeah—I guess it would have been nice to have a relationship, but what does Mitch have to do with all of this?"

"Don't be coy with me—you've known Mitch had her this whole time and haven't said a word."

"I don't—seriously—I thought he was dead just like the rest of you."

"Fine—play dumb, I don't care. But the longer you keep Natalie and my niece from their family the less likely I'll have any interest in you. You're a better man than Mitch—don't be a follower in his game, because most of his followers end up dead," she said as she got quickly out of her chair and walked out the door. She looked at Cris who had been standing there waiting for her and fell into his arms—hoping what she'd said to Miles was enough to bring her sister home.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Sorry for the delay--I didn't post it on here, but I've been in the process of packing and moving. Those parts are done (the unpacking will probably never be--LOL!) so the muse is back and ready to write. Ya'll enjoy! Until next time--PCGirl.

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John glanced at his watch once again—it was past midnight at this point and he let out a long sigh. Vincent's lawyer had gotten here over an hour ago—and the two men had been in the interrogation room arguing this whole time. His lawyer wanted him to say nothing—incriminating or otherwise, but John hoped the man did have a conscious when it came to Natalie and would do otherwise.

Suddenly the door opened quickly and he watched the lawyer storm out of the room, giving John a quick look before continuing his walk out of the station. He walked slowly into the interrogation room, his hands in his pockets and he looked at Vincent sitting there quietly at the table, "What's the verdict?"

"Who needs lawyers anyways," he huffed before making eye contact with John and Bo who had seen the lawyer also leave just then. "I'm waiving my rights to counsel at this time—I'm doing the right thing for Natalie."

"The right thing would have never gotten her into this mess in the first place," said John to himself. He was glad Jones was going to tell him the events that had occurred prior to her abduction—because he honestly didn't know what the next step would be otherwise.

"I know that—I know I've screwed up—why do you think I'm hear willing to throw myself to the wolves for her?"

"Ok, if that really is the case start talking—how were you introduced to both men?"

"I met Miles here in Llanview—,"

"_She's something, isn't she?" said the man as he walked up next to Vincent in the coffee shop—Vincent had been standing there for a minute watching Natalie study. _

_He looked at the man that was talking to—he seemed his age, and wore a baseball cap and sunglasses—almost as if he didn't want anyone to notice him right then. "Yeah—you know her?"_

"_A long time ago—seemed like a whole different lifetime. Never saw a girl like her, from the wrong side of the tracks in AC being an heiress."_

"_She's more than an heiress—she's—."_

"_Man you've got it bad for her," he grinned as he took a sip of his coffee._

"I looked at him when he made that comment and left—something seemed off about him, but when I saw him a couple days later he—he told me there was a way I could make sure she was always safe."

"And you believed him?" asked John.

"You were treating her like crap. Anything this guy was selling had to be better than what you were offering her—which at that point was pretty much nothing."

John mulled the comment over in his mind for a moment, "So turning her over to a man that literally tried to remove her heart from her chest was better?"

"I didn't know any of that. All I knew was at that point I was desperate to get her away from you—you were draining her and I wanted to see that spark back in her eyes—that's all."

"You're a smart man, Jones—you have connections. You can't tell me that at some point you didn't do a history on Mitch—see what he was really about."

"Like I said—I was desperate. As for the search—I did it, but I figured what I had to give up was worth handing her over for a couple of months."

"What did you give up exactly?" asked Bo.

"Two small business ventures I had going—both were out west."

"Ok, fine—tell us about the fires—did you know Miles was setting them up all along?"

Vincent shook his head, "No—not until it almost killed Natalie. I confronted him that night."

"So it was you that attacked him in that alley?"

"Yeah, it was me—,"

"_What the hell was that tonight? You almost got Natalie killed!" yelled Vincent as he caught up with Miles in an alleyway not far from the hospital._

"_Keep your voice down—she never was going to be hurt—it's all part of the plan."_

"_Part of the plan? I'm not sure about this plan anymore—I never wanted her to get hurt."_

"_You can't back out now—if you do then when they start looking into the fires more and more evidence will start showing you were behind them all."_

"So he blackmailed you into going through with the abduction?"

"Yeah, but not before I used him as a punching bag first—it was actually his idea. Help make it look like she left on her own and all," he said solemnly. "You know—when I saw her this morning—out in the garden, I knew I had to come here. I knew I had to make it right for her—maybe she'll forgive me one day."

"I doubt that," rolled John's eyes as he started for the door to get an officer to take Vincent down to lockup.

-----------------------

John walked into his office and closed the door, making sure it was locked before lying down on the uncomfortable couch. He'd stay here for now—the morning sun would be filling his office soon and then he'd discuss the next step with Bo.

As he closed his eyes and tried to sleep for an hour his mind started to wander—was this all his fault? If he'd treated Natalie better—treated how she deserved—when he'd gotten out of the hospital would Vincent have never agreed to abducting her?

What happened in the past didn't matter this time—they'd find her and bring her and their daughter home safely—he thought as his mind finally gave way to sleep that it had been missing these past few months.

-------------------

He laid on the top bunk of his cell staring at the ceiling—he hadn't slept all night. He'd spent a good chunk of years in jail already, but he'd never felt this before. Fear. It had been Jessica's words that had been repeating through his head all night, D_on't be a follower in his game, because most of his followers end up dead._

She was right—he was the only link between Natalie and her family now. He knew very little of his brother, but he suspected the man could easily have an accident occur—brother or not.

Jumping off his bed he ran to the bars and shouted for a guard.

"What do you want, Lennox?" asked the guard, upset that his morning coffee had been interrupted.

"I need to see John McBain with the Llanview PD immediately. Give him the message I'm ready to talk."

---------------

John walked out of his office and rubbed his eyes—it was a quarter to ten and he was surprised he'd slept that long, and that peacefully. The last day he'd felt this refreshed was when he'd walked out of Natalie's hospital.

He saw Officer Davis begin to walk past him and then turned around, "Just wanted to let you know the prisoner is on his way—he should be here within the next fifteen minutes."

"What prisoner?" he asked, shaking his head in confusion.

"Miles Lennox. He's been trying to reach you all morning. Finally we called the Commissioner and he said to have him transferred here—he'll be here soon too."

"But why is he being transferred here?"

"He kept complaining that he thought his life could be endanger—Bo agreed that it was a possibility so we're keeping him here until Natalie is found, sir," said Davis and the scattered away before John had a chance to blow up at him for nobody waking him up.

-------------------

John glanced between Bo and Miles as they sat in the same interrogation room that they'd been in with Vincent hours before. When they brought him into the station he could see the fear in the man's eyes, and could tell the man was willing to do whatever he could just so he knew his brother was behind bars and couldn't touch him, "When did you meet Mitch for the first time?"

"He'd sent me a few letters while I was still incarcerated—one of the last ones had that picture of Natalie in it—the one I'm sure Vincent told you about," he said as both men nodded.

"He met me at the gate when they released me—we drove to this abandoned mansion on the outskirts of town—the whole time talking about how he thought Natalie deserved to be punished for putting me in jail."

John looked at Bo—abandoned mansion? "Outskirts of what town—Llanview or AC?" he interrupted.

"Here in Llanview—he called it—."

"Lion's Heart," said Bo quietly and watched Miles head whip around to look at it. "Is that where he was taking Natalie next?"

"Yeah, but I don't think it was going to be long. Something about her being his wife again—I didn't want to know anymore details than that."

John looked at Bo—and then walked out of the room and into the hall—barking orders and getting a task force together quickly.


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: Hope ya'll like. It's a bit dark in the beginning, but I tried to lighten it up some in the end. Only a couple more on this one. :) Until next time--PCGirl.

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John pulled his car to the side of the road and waited for the other unmarked cars to pull in behind his. "Ok, I'm here—you'll meet Officer Ramsey at the hospital?" he asked Michael on his cell phone and took a deep breath.

"I'm leaving now—John, don't be shocked at her reaction at seeing her. If Mitch Lawrence already has Natalie brainwashed that she's his wife it's going to take more than simple coaxing for her to leave him."

"I'll handle her," said John with a slight laugh in his voice as he hung up the phone. Putting the phone in his pocket he gave a sigh again—this wasn't going to be the first time he'd walked into this scenario, and it definitely wouldn't be the last. He knew she'd fight—and he wasn't completely sure he had it in him to fight her and take care of Mitch at the same time.

That is why he had Officer Ramsey, he thought as he watched two more cars pull behind his. He'd already gone over it with him before they even left the station—once someone had Natalie away from Mitch he was take her straight to the hospital—ignoring whatever screams, pleas, or insults she threw at him.

John got out of his and stared up at the trees and the blue sky that got through the canopy they created—taking a deep breath while waiting on the other officers he mumbled to himself, "You've done this dozens of times before, McBain—you can do it one more time."

---------------

As they let themselves into the house he noticed all the furniture was draped in white cloths—making the darkened shapes look like monsters. The living room was empty and though he wouldn't risk anything and check—he was almost positive the power was not turned on.

He motioned for Ramsey to stay at the door as he pointed for a few of the officers to go search towards the kitchen area and the rest went with him up the stairs. It was the dancing shadows made by candlelight on the wall that caught his eye and he felt the bile rise up into his throat at what he was about to find.

He motioned for Davis and the rook cop that had been assigned to him to move to the other side of the door and had them lower their guns as he pushed the door open with his foot and they heard it creek open.

If he had been a rookie he would have frozen in his tracks, but swallowed hard at watching Natalie stand there in front of the bed—in a sheer white gown, her head thrown back as Mitch kiss her neck and traveled lower—his hands pushing the fabric up her legs.

"Mitch Lawrence," said Davis loudly as he walked forward some—and John was thankful he had someone there, someone who he trusted, because as much as he searched for it, his voice was gone.

John watched as Mitch turned around slowly, an evil grin on his face as he stared straight at John—instead of Davis, "I'm sorry—but you are interrupting our wedding night. Unless you'd like to watch."

"You sicko," muttered the officer that was behind John.

John's eyes moved from Mitch and to Natalie—who was standing there, her eyes hollow as if she hadn't a clue who any of the men standing in the doorway were—especially John. He'd been expecting it, but it hurt to see it, and suddenly he found his strength and moved in front of Davis, "We are here to arrest you for the abduction of Natalie Buchanan and her unborn child."

"And who the hell are you?" she asked, her voice sharp with wit—and John wondered if that's how she acted when she first came to Llanview.

So many comments came to mind at the phrase—your fiancé, the father of your child, you friend, the man that would die for you—but he kept it professional, "Lieutenant John McBain of the Llanivew Police Department. If you will go with my officer here."

"I certainly will not—this is my wedding night and I want to make love to my husband," she said as she put a protective hand on Mitch's arm.

John's fist tightened, but it was again Davis that took over, "If that's the truth then you wouldn't mind if we took him down for some simple questioning. You can come too if you like—I promise we won't take up your whole night. Your family is worried about you, that is all," he said as he put out a hand of friendship.

Natalie began to rebut as Mitch turned to her, "Darling—let's not let this ruin our night. We'll go to the station, get this all cleared up, and then we can continue what we had started," he said, finishing with a deep kiss as John watch the man's hand slip under the edge of the white negligee she wore and touch her upper bare thigh.

"Fine, but I'm going with him," she said and released her grasp of Mitch's arm and followed Davis out of the room to where Ramsey was waiting—her eyes not connecting with

As John listened as she walked down the steps he kept his eyes glued to Mitch's and could only think one thing—_that was way too easy._

--------------------

"I want you and your goons to let me go—there is nothing wrong with me—and there is nothing wrong with my baby," said Natalie, her voice rising at the situation. They'd tricked her—they hadn't taken her to the station where they'd taken Mitch, but the hospital instead. And now she was sitting in the bed staring Michael down from across the room.

Michael couldn't help but smile—Natalie was here, and except for whatever Mitch had done to wipe her memory, she was fine—especially her lungs, "I can't release you until all tests come back."

"Whatever—you said your last name was McBain. Are you related to that damn cop?" she said as she leaned back on the pillows and crossed her arms.

Michael turned and looked at the cop that was sitting in the room with them, "Can I have a minute alone with Natalie?"

"McBain told me not to let her out of my sight."

"She won't be going anywhere—and I'll handle my brother," he said as the officer walked out of the room. "Now—where were we?"

"You already answered my question. Is this what he does? Rescue women who really don't need to be rescued? Because I think the better word for it would be stalking."

He didn't have a chance to respond before the door behind him opened and John walked in, "John," he said quietly.

"Where is my husband?" she yelled, as she began to get out of the bed to attack him.

John flashed back to the moments he'd heard similar comments come out of her mouth, "He's still being questioned."

"I want to see him."

"That's not a good idea, Natalie," he said—this time when he looked into her eyes he didn't see the hollow look of not recognizing him, but the look one gave to someone they hated, and he figured he'd take what he could get from her—for now.

Natalie jumped off the bed this time and was in John's face before Michael had a moment to react, "You don't get to tell me what's a good idea, John. I'm not your damsel in distress—I was with my HUSBAND about to make love to him on our wedding night and you stopped it. Do you do this regularly? Ruin people's wedding nights? Because you seemed to not be bothered with it. But it doesn't matter because I'm going to be back with Mitch when you realize I left on my own—I wanted to be with him—and I will be again and we'll raise our child together as a family."

Michael jumped in before John could say anything and grabbed his brother—dragging him into the hallway, "You need to go."

"No—I don't. She's—damn it, Mike!" he shouted.

"Shh—may I remind you that you are in a hospital," he said under his breath.

"The woman I love and my child are in there—she's putting our daughter in harms way—I will not let her go back to Mitch."

"She won't, but if you go off on her like you were about to just then all bets are off. Getting her to remember her life from before is going to take time. You can't push her into remembering—so I suggest you go take a walk, or better yet—try and get some sleep. She'll be here tomorrow."

John opened his mouth to argue some more, but he knew Michael was right and without another word walked towards the elevator and left.

-------------

John walked into his office and over to the desk—he honestly didn't know what to do. She looked at him with disgust and anger—something he expected almost four years ago, but not now.. Told him the moment she was released that she'd go back to him. What could he do? He couldn't force her to love him—he'd wait for her to remember everything, but he wasn't going to let his child near Lawrence again.

"You've got to do what is right for Natalie."

John looked up to see his dad there in the room talking with him, "I'm trying—but she's fighting me on this. She doesn't have any memories of us—it's hard to point out all the good times when she doesn't remember them."

"What if it's not the memories that will help her, but just your presence?"

"What?"

"You work better when she's nearby—not necessarily talking, just being there. So do that. Just be with her—even when she's yelling and screaming at you—just stay there. She'll realize you aren't going anywhere—and she'll remember all the other times you wouldn't leave her side.

"Michael says to give her time."

"If it was Marcie your brother wouldn't dare leave her side—don't let him doctor you into thinking she doesn't need you. Because she does and she always will," he said, giving John a smile before he disappeared. John let a small smile appear on his face before grabbing his coat and heading back to the hospital.


	8. Chapter 8

John sat in the chair watching her sleep—she'd been asleep when he'd come back to the hospital and he'd sent the guard home—taking over watching her for the night. She was beautiful—pregnancy added an extra glow to her and he couldn't help but smiling. He took the chance of waking her up and held her hand and rubbing it gently—as he fell asleep he knew his dad was right—it was just each other's presence that put them at ease.

_Natalie dreamt of being in a park—it felt familiar. Like she'd been there before. She was pushing her daughter on a swing—she was five and had bright red hair like hers. She felt at peace—and couldn't help but smiling. Suddenly a little boy around the age of three ran around the hedged entrance and over to her—he had dark hair and blue eyes._

"_Mama—I did it! I went down the slide all by myself!" he grinned._

"_You did? I'm so proud of you."_

"_Daddy told me not to be scared and I wasn't—I'm going to go again," he said as he ran back around the corner and to the slide again._

_Natalie smiled at watching him and then saw her husband walk around the corner—when she saw who it was though it confused her, it almost made sense._

"John," she said softly as she began to wake up and wondered why she would dream of him being the father—she looked over at who was lying there next to her and realized it was him, and he was holding her hand. "What the hell do you think you're doing?" she yelled.

John jumped in his seat at hearing her voice—he'd just fallen asleep, and couldn't remember the dream but felt like they were dreaming of the same thing, "I'm sitting here with you—where I belong to."

"Like hell you are. I'm stuck here because of you ruining my wedding night—where is my husband?"

John just shrugged and changed the subject, "You once asked me why every time you open your eyes from the dark here I am. I'm making sure that when you open your eyes this time—for real, and start remembering the memories between us—that I'm right now, with you. Because that was the truth, Natalie. Whenever something happened that put our lives in danger—the other was there when we woke up to wash away the nightmares."

"I don't need you," she said, though she felt the truth in his words.

John stared at her stomach and a half smile appeared on his face as he began to talk, "The night of the wreck—I never told you I had a vision. It was of us at Rodi's—you were wearing that blue dress that I love and we were playing pool with our kids. It was a boy and a girl—she had red hair just like yours, and he had dark hair but his personality reminded me of you—confident and just a bit of a smart mouth," he said with a laugh.

"It's going to happen Natalie—you can argue with me all you want right now, but in the end it's going to be me at that pool table playing with our kids, not Mitch Lawrence. I just wish you believed me," he said as he got up out of his chair.

"Where are you going?" she asked, as much as she wanted him to leave—as much as she was angry with him, she needed him by her side.

"Go walk around—get some coffee. I'll be back," he said as he began to leave.

The voice he heard was soft, but it melted any worries away when he heard it, "John. Don't leave." And he didn't—he couldn't—so he sat back down and they just sat there, without any words spoken, until both had fallen back asleep.

-------------

John woke up slowly—his neck hurt from the position in the chair he'd slept in, but at opening his eyes and seeing Natalie sitting there, watching him, all the pain went away, "Hey."

"Hey," she said softly.

"You been awake long?" he asked, and saw something in her eyes.

"An hour or so."

"Why didn't you wake me up?"

"You looked peaceful—and I figured you probably didn't get a lot of sleep while I was missing."

"Yeah, sleep doesn't come easily to me when I'm on a serious case, and you know that. Is there something else wrong?"

"I had a dream—that's what woke me up, and the images I saw—they don't make sense with what Mitch said."

"What happened?" he asked as he scooted closer to her bed and took her hand—glad when she willingly took his and squeezed it.

"Mitch was there—I was in an operating room—my hair was blonde, and I remember someone wanting to cut me open and steal my heart. Did he really do that? Why can't I remember anything? How stupid am I? I married a man who tried to steal my heart," she said while tears started to fall.

"Hey—shhh," said John as he jumped up onto the bed next to her and held her. "It's not your fault—he's sick and controlling, and I promise he won't hurt you or our child," he said as his hands glided over her silky hair. Hearing the door open he looked to see Jessica's head peek in and he nodded for her to come in. "Your sister is here and I know you two have some catching up to do—I'll be back later. You gonna be ok?"

Natalie just nodded at him—wiping the tears from her blue eyes and giving Jessica an uneasy grin, "Jess."

"You remember?"

"Not much—just bits and pieces," she said as John walked towards the door.

"Jessica—can I talk to you for a moment?" he asked and had her come outside with him. "Don't let her beat herself up about Mitch—she's starting to remember, and I know it's going to be a hard road. I'll be back in awhile—if you need to leave before I get back, call my cell phone, ok?"

"Ok—thanks for being with her last night. She needed it."

"We both did," he said as he looked at the closed door one more time before leaving.

-------------------

"Go take a break, Harris," said John to the guard down in holding as he let John through and closed the door behind him.

"How is my wife today?" asked Mitch as he stood nose to nose with John, a smirk on his face.

"Scared of you."

"Well, of course—with all the lies you've been telling her. When I talk to her it'll all be straightened out though."

"She's remembering things on her own—things from the past. You know—if you'd actually gotten her out of Llanview and away from everyone for a length of time your plan might have worked, Lawrence. But she's home now—with all of her loved ones—and you can't touch her now."

"Does she love you? Does she remember anything from your past?"

"She will," he said confidently.

"What if she doesn't? What if she decides she wants to make her marriage work?"

"Like I said—she's afraid of you now—game over. You lose," said John as he decided to go ahead and leave the holding area before Lawrence found the right button to push.

---------------

John walked into Natalie's room with a hand behind his back—she was sitting on the edge of the bed, dressed in an outfit he was sure belonged to Jessica. "Hey—Mike told me you were getting released in a few."

"Yeah, I'm going to stay with Vicki—my mom. She came by for a visit—along with every other relative or semi-relative I have," she said with a smile and noticed he was holding something. "What's that, McBain?" she asked in a teasing tone.

"This?" he asked bashfully as he brought his hand around and showed her a pink blanket. "I bought this awhile ago—before we ever would have found out what we were having. I don't know why, but something told me we were having a girl. I'll take it slow, Natalie—whenever you are ready to get back what we lost, I'm ready—I just wanted to go ahead and give you this. To prove to you I'm ready to be a father—I'm ready to spend my life with you."

Natalie took the blanket and held it in her hands, rubbing the soft fabric and just staring down at it for a moment before speaking, "You don't have to prove anything to me, John."

"Yeah, I do—you ready to go home? I mean to Llanfair?"

"Will you be nearby?"

"Right down the drive—Michael, Marcie, and I have been staying at the cottage since the fire. I'll always be just a phone call away," he said giving her a kiss on the forehead before holding his hand out for her to take.


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: Sorry for the delay, but thank you all for the wonderful reads and reviews. Ya'll enjoy! Until next time--ya'll are the best--PCGirl.

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John got in the car to go to the crime scene—he didn't have to go, he could have sent someone else, but he couldn't sit in his office right now. Not while he knew Natalie was on her way to Statesville to talk with one of the men that helped in her abduction. As he pulled out of the station he thought about last night when she dropped the announcement of her visit on him.

_John sat there next to Natalie on the couch as the movie wrapped up. The past month and a half had flown by—they'd spend the evenings together and then he'd drive her back up the drive to Llanview. He wasn't rushing anything—taking everything as slow as she felt was necessary._

_This whole time she'd been meeting with Dr. Crosby on a daily basis—getting through the memories of her time with Mitch and other memories from before that she once again had to get through and understand. He never pressured her on what went on in the sessions—though she would bring up specific points that had to do with something in their relationship._

"_I wanted you to know I'm going to Statesville tomorrow," said Natalie, nonchalantly as if it was something she did on a daily basis._

_  
"What for?"_

"_To talk with Vincent Jones. There are questions I need answered and he's the only one I trust to give me the right answers."_

"_You trust him?"_

"_No, but I know he's remorseful—he wouldn't have come to you that night and confessed to everything if he wasn't. I have to at least try, John."_

_John just nodded—knowing that arguing with her would be useless at this point, "Ok."_

"_That's it? You aren't going to try and go with me?"_

"_Will you let me?"_

"_No."_

"_Then there's no use in trying. But I'll be here when you get back," he said as he brushed her hair out of her face. He wanted so badly to kiss her—to make love to her and he could feel his heart rate go up a little so quickly got off the couch and pretended to stretch his legs._

"_I—I better get going," said Natalie as she got up herself and went for her coat. As she walked outside and waited on John behind her she once again thought about how awkward it was between them, but hopefully after her visit with Vincent tomorrow they could finally get back to where they were before._

--------------

"Go ahead and take a seat, the prisoner will be here shortly," said the guard as Natalie walked in through the door he held open, and heard him close it behind the two of them.

As she sat down and her hands ran across the cool metal table she started to second guess herself—she'd been so sure last night she wanted to do this, needed to do this on her own, and now she was almost wishing John had insisted on coming with her.

Placing a hand on her round stomach she took a deep breath and didn't look back up until she heard the door across from her open up. Watching Vincent Jones walk through the door and sit across from her she felt her confidence in what she was going to say rise again.

"Natalie—I—I wasn't expecting you to visit me," he said giving her a smug smile as he sat across from her and tried to take her hand. "But I'm glad you did—you being pregnant, it makes you look more ravishing then normal."

"Cut the compliments, Vincent—they don't work on me anymore," she said—her voice cool as she snatched her hand out of his grasp. "From everything I remember you seem like you were a good friend to me—so I can't understand why you thought it was a good idea to help in my kidnapping."

"I'm sorry," he said as he hung his head for a moment. "I thought I was doing the right thing. McBain—he wasn't treating you the way you should have been treated. I was sure it was the best thing for you to get out of that relationship."

"It wasn't your decision to make. If I had honestly thought John and I didn't stand a chance I would have walked away. Because of your decision I put both myself and my child through a horrible ordeal. If it hadn't been for John—," she said as she ran a hand over her face.

"Like I said—I'm sorry—hopefully one day you can forgive me."

At hearing his request she wanted to laugh at the absurdness of it all, "There's a lot of things I can forgive—but I keep thinking about my childhood—being kept from my real family courtesy of Mitch Laurence. What you did almost made my daughter's childhood mirror mine. Sorry, I can't forgive that," she said as she got up and without another word turned and left the room—ready for the next step.

------------------------------

John glanced at his watch as he walked through the station and to his office—Natalie's session with Dr. Crosby should have started ten minutes ago so he figured he had fifty minutes to finish up the day's work.

Walking in the office though he was surprised to see Crosby sitting at his desk and Natalie sitting across from him, "What's going on?"

"We're having our session—have a seat, John," said Crosby, motioning to the seat next to Natalie. John did so without question, though he was curious as to what was going on.

"Did everything go ok with Vincent? Did he upset you?" asked John as he looked at Natalie's face and could see in her eyes she was trying to decide to tell him something.

Natalie nodded softly, "He said everything I expected him to say—that he thought he was doing what was best for me. He actually asked for me to forgive him—I wanted to laugh in his face and tell him how absurd that idea was, but I couldn't."

"Good. He doesn't deserve it—not with what he put you through," said John as he reached out and touched her face gently.

"There's one more question I need answered though. Why were you so quick to forgive me for what I almost did?"

It was John's turn to nearly laugh at the absurdity of what she just said—and he was able to hold most of it in, but the humor quickly turned to anger as he looked at Crosby, "You set her up to ask this, didn't you? This is one of your weird shrink tactics where you try and make her dig deeper into her hurt. I really thought you were better than that—at least with Natalie."

"She brought up the question to me last week—I told her when she felt strong enough to ask you she should, that's all," he said as she stood up and walked towards the door.

John just sat there, looking towards the outside window of his office until he heard the door shut and Crosby's footsteps go down the hall, "Why are you asking this?" he said as he stood up and began to pace some.

Natalie stood herself and walked towards the window, remembering scenes that still were scattered, but speaking softly, "I remember other times—when I did something foolish and it would take you awhile to move on from it. But this time it didn't—you immediately were at my side and haven't really left it. Why is this time different, John?"

"I never believed for one second you would walk away from everyone you love on purpose. Some wanted me to accept it as a possibility—or that it was you trying to make yourself the center of attention, but I couldn't.

"And when I saw you I knew I was right. Your eyes are always filled with this life Natalie—that night when I found you--they were cold and empty. I can't be mad at you for something you had no control over."

"What if you hadn't gotten there in time? What if Mitch had taken me somewhere already?" she asked, getting scared once again about the thought of Mitch touching her—and her letting him so easily.

"I would have kept searching for you—I don't care if it hadn't taken six months or six years. I would have found you—and when I did I would be at your side the whole time, until you and our daughter came back to me," he said as he walked to her and placed his hand gently on her rounded belly.

"I'm glad to know that," she said, her eyes filling with tears. "I've got one more request," she said as John looked at her with bewilderment. She slipped her hand into her coat pocket and revealed her engagement ring.

John smirked at seeing it in her palm, "You sure? I don't want to push you into anything until you are ready."

"I'm ready—we're ready," she said as she took her free hand and placed it over his.

------------------------

_Six Months Later_

John turned around and took the ring from Michael—trying to ignore the giant smile on his brother's face. As he turned back to Natalie—standing there he couldn't believe they'd actually gotten here.

His hands were shaking as he repeated the words the Priest said—his eyes completely fixed on Natalie's—blue eyes locked onto blue eyes.

Natalie repeated the exchanging of the rings and as they turned back to the Priest for the end of the ceremony neither could focus on the words he said—after everything they had been through—they'd made it.

As they kissed and walked down the aisle Natalie glanced over to Vicki who was holding their sleeping daughter it was over. The past and whatever it contained vanished—all she could think of was her beautiful baby and her husband that stood by her through everything.


End file.
